Your Greek Family

Littley Perfect 

By Marisa Patwa

Saying “big” in a room full of sorority girls is like screaming mom at the grocery store. A dozen or so heads–in cute, messy buns–will turn around, and look at you, hoping it is their big calling out for them. When you and your big finally lock eyes, you can not help but smile. You are theirs and they are yours.

This is one of the really truly rewarding things about being in a sorority: having a Greek family.

A few weeks after receiving my bid from AOII last year, I was gifted with a big of my own, Bobbi, or Notorious B.I.G as a I like to call her. I barely knew her but there I was, stuck with this girl for the seemingly rest of my life (Love you Notorious). I was skeptical of the whole process at first. But it is not just a random selection and for the most part, girls do have a say in who their big or little is going to be. And Bobbi and I just clicked. Funny enough, we are actually quite different people and I have learned a lot from her about the woman I want to be.

The great thing about bigs is that they are there to help guide you through integrating into being in a sorority, which is not exactly a natural thing. There are meetings, philanthropies, service hours and ritual and your big is there to remind you to attend Rock for Riley and to eat chili cheese dogs with you at Sonic when you just need to cry it all out. They are there to help you through your first time on the other side of recruitment, listen to your silly jokes, encourage you when you do well and help you when you fall down.

Contrary to popular belief, we do not spend every waking second together. We can go weeks without talking or talk every single day, but I know she will always be there for me. And I will always be there for her.

It is not a contrived relationship like most people assume but a special kind of relationship you will never be able to have with someone else.

Except for your little.

This year, I knew I was going to have a chance at having a little. I also knew that I may not get one at all, which made me kind of nervous. I wanted to have one, not just for the sake of being able to say “little!” but to help a younger sister through joining a sorority like B.I.G. helped me. I also knew how much responsibility having a little was and I wanted to take it on completely. I just had a feeling that having one would change me and help me mature and grow in more ways than and I could imagine. And it has. Or should I say she.

Recruitment was the first time I ever spoke to my little. It was the first night of 1st Party and as soon as I sat down to talk to her, I knew she was going to be my little. I’m well aware of how annoying and cliché that is but it is unabashedly true. I had no inkling during recruitment that I was going to have an instantaneous connection with anyone. If it happened it happened and if it didn’t, then that was alright because each girl truly is unique and great. But with Gisela, I just knew.

I first resonated with the fact that we both have darker complexions and hair. My second bias was when she began to discuss her love for “Gossip Girl”. Our talk was easy and fun, just like our relationship would later be. I was lucky enough to be able to pref her as well, which means I was able to spend an hour with her on the last night of recruitment, explaining to her my story: why I went through recruitment, why I joined AOII, and why it is one of the best decisions I have ever made.

The next day, as my entire chapter waited out on the grassy knoll to see who are new sisters would be on bid day, I was so thrilled when I saw Gisela run out to us as she had accepted her bid to AOII.

In only a few short weeks, I would get a call from our new member educator, Shannon while shopping at Wal-Mart telling me the great news: Gisela was my little.

I giggled as you would expect any high-pitched sorority girl too and pounced on my sister that was with me then, my home girl Marissa.

The next week was big/little week, five days of bigs dropping off special gifts to their little’s dorm rooms or to the suite. The main purpose is to hand down a lot of your own sorority paraphernalia, which for AOII, usually includes hoards of shirts and anything and everything Pandas–our mascot. My favorite part of that week was on Friday, a few days before big/little reveal. I went shopping with Gisela–who still had no idea I was her big–and she told me something that almost made my heart stop.

“I know who my big is,” she said, smiling deviously.

I glanced down at my phone nervously, trying to play cool.

“Oh yeah?” I said. “Who?”

I was going over how I was going to play it off in my head if she guessed me when she said the name of another sister.

I almost burst out laughing but I remained collected. You see, one of the most fun parts of big/little week is making the littles guess who their bigs are and trying to keep them guessing all week. The reason we do this is because it is all the more special when they are surprised at reveal. And boy was my little surprised when she found out it was me.

It’s only been a few months and I couldn’t imagine a more perfect little.

The thing about littles is that they are not just your little but one of your closest friends, confidants and sisters. You share each other’s secrets, complain about chapter, laugh at each other when they look bad and hug each other even after being a part for only a day. At least this is how my little and I are, and I wouldn’t trade it or her for the world.

Gisela was initiated this Sunday into our chapter and I could not be more excited for her and the next three and a half years she gets to spend here as an AOII. And little, if you are reading this, I love you, your awkward emo phase through middle school and all.